Styx "Full Version"

I AM DEATH

Corporeal

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I have become.  I am here. 

It has been a year since I have become corporeal.  I had not felt the sun on my face in 5 millennia.  To feel the sand between my toes and taste the aromatic scents of the world.  It is as if I was a babe opening my eyes for the first time.

Allow me to state the complexity of my existence.  I am here, but I am not, I exist but I have no life, none know me but all will.  I have watched humanity for so long, to finally join your species is an honor, there are so many whose jealousy of my current state may become apparent to the world since here I will be divulging things no mortal should ever here.

You may ask why I have decided to divulge these truths.  In my tenure as your end all entity I have come to have a passion for the mortal coil.  I have become saddened by the current state of you development and I hope that what I divulge will enable you to get back on the right path. With this in mind I have decided to reach out to you through your popular media.  I am not one for cameras and no mortal should know me.  Not until your final moments. 

The world has been in pain for so long but there is always hope.  That hope has been lost in your souls, when you come to me there is only pain now.  I escort you to your final destination but it is not what your religion teaches you.  Your death is a state of mind.  Where you end up when you die is due to your state of mind, the deepest recesses of your soul.

In this blog I will reveal to you what finality is truly like and what a person can do to avoid an unpleasant existence.  Please heed my words, for I will only be able to stay in my corporeal state for a short time.

I am Death, destroyer of worlds and bringer of darkness, I feast, you die.  The soul that powers the consciousness of the being that you are nourishes me, the greater the deeds the more sweet the taste.  I come to you and you are mine.  I love all those whose deeds are evil, I take such great pleasure in watching you burn.  It was said by the great philosopher Jesus of Nazareth that it is easier for a camel to fit through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to be admitted into the kingdom of god.  A truly wise man he was indeed and I only hope to one day achieve the wisdom that he had.  I have been here for thousands of years and no man including myself has ever risen to the heights of wisdom that the myth and legend of that man.  I bear no testament of my own save the experience of the world that has been thrust upon in the eons that I have walked this earth.

I came from nowhere is what I can remember, I have been here so long that I forgot where it was I started, my childhood is gone, my adolescence is like a dream that one desperately attempts to clasp and remember before they awake and it slips like sand through ones fingers.  I have no idea about my early manhood either, the years are not kind to someone who lives forever.  I am not hear to give you a life lesson or comment on the socioeconomic eccentricities of the modern society or the dark ages.  I can give you no advice on how to live your life.  I can only tell you where you go when your soul blooms, and where you are cast when your soul rots.

It was said that a person who is true to themselves will never doubt their actions or stray from the path they have set out on.  That may have been me who said that, I would love to think that I am that wise but one thing I have noticed in my long years of ferrying the dead is that evil deeds do not necessarily damn a soul.  I have seen serial killers and rapists who have moved on to better places because they from the beginning understood who they were and did not doubt the darkness of their souls and although they committed heinous and evil acts they were given the chance to understand their nature, learn from it and move to a better place.

On the other end of the spectrum I have seen victims who through no fault of their own crossed in my hand to a place of sheer terror because they could not get past those fears and become human again, I see many of them from time to time wandering on the banks of the Styx lost and wailing and I more than once tried to reach for them and bring them to the far shore, but they are so hopelessly lost that their finger dissipate like water vapor as they touch me.  The frame of mind you are in can weigh heavily on your soul, if you cannot escape your fear, jealousy, anger, lust in life it will follow you to death.  Death is not the finality of suffering.  As many humans can attest to it follows you through death and sometimes people can see and feel the pain of the dead.  It is like a thin sheet of reality between life and death.  A warning for the living of what intense feelings can lead to after death.  So many mortals do not heed these warnings and hide behind the dogma of their religions.

One group of people I love the most is the scientists and atheists, they are so sure of how the universe works, they are enraged and dumbfounded when I come for them. They are an amusement for me because they think they understand the universe so well just because they are able to observe and quantify everything in their lives.  What is so amusing is that they spend so much time in their own dogmatic logic that they give no consideration to the unknown.  I love to see them sometimes long after they have been brought to the other side.  They wander aimlessly through their afterlife, forever confused, forever angry.  I have seldom seen them escape that endless loop and move on to a better place.

The religious are an interesting lot as well, they all expect to be accepted into paradise when they cross over.  Paradise is a state of mind and if you are not in that state of mind when you come to me then you will be lost.  I think the point of me writing this testament and giving it to the world is that if you do not work to find your own way you will be lost in my world. It weighs heavy on my own soul to see so many so lost and I feel it has come time to try and redirect the living.  You must understand that you do not know what becomes of you when you die and the one who thinks he or she had it figured out is a fool.  You must accept that your state of mind is the determining factor of your death.  Paradise and Hell do indeed exist but nothing is eternal not even death.

I have seen so many faces re-emerge through the centuries, reborn, brought back to Earth to try again, the world is classroom and in order to move on you must understand yourself.  I wish that I could save the lost souls I see but it is not within my power to do so.  You must find the strength in yourself as a species, as a people to move forward in your spiritual evolution. I cannot prove to you the existence of your ultimate fate in mere words, it takes the experience of death to actually create that realization.  The only thing I can do to convince you is to state that energy can neither be created nor destroyed.  What was here in the beginning will be here in the end.  You cannot escape the cycle of life and death no matter how hard you try.  For every action there must be a reaction for every deed an opposite one must be created.  There is a delicate balance of good and evil in the cosmos and the laws of this must be obeyed.  You cannot know good without evil and vice versa.

Please heed my words I am trying to save any who read this from a terrible fate.  I have watched you through the eons and have fallen I love with your existence as a father or mother falls in love with their child and worries about their future.  I have waited for so long for you to awaken but this has not come to fruition and now I am at my patience end.  You must awaken or you will be doomed to fall.

You are not the first species to evolve intelligence on this planet but if you do not change your ways you will be the last. You will go the way they did.  I visit them sometimes, they are stuck in a world of perpetual misery where time does not exist. These beings allowed themselves to fall beyond and ability to pull themselves out of it, they were here before even I existed and they will be in there endless loop long after I am gone and time itself ceases.  I tell you these things not to scare you but to prod you.  Please amend yourselves.  Good or evil it makes no difference, just know yourself.  Knowledge of oneself is the ultimate power, it has the ability to move you forward.  Know that when you die you will live again and what is in between those lives is what you make it.  You cannot escape the payment of the debt you accrue, you will pay for your deeds, you cannot escape this.

I cannot be negotiated with, I cannot be bribed, I cannot be ignored.  I am Death, I am a fact, an eventuality.  I will come for you regardless of your beliefs, your dogma or your ignorance. Heed my words and save yourself endless damnation and tears.

   I begin this post today with a thought.  Why do humans so often look for ways to sabotage each other when it is in their nature to work as a collective to advance their interests?  My boat is host to innumerable souls that only thought of themselves against their better judgment, yet they are still surprised at where they end up.  When I bring them to the far shore and they are forced from the boat, they scream in ignorance when the lost souls descend upon them.  Later I see them again, lost, they have learned nothing.  I think to myself, “Maybe in their next life when they are in the position of those they preyed upon, maybe they will learn.”  Yet.  I have seen so many live many lives and learn nothing.  Where they go when the universe gives up on them, what they become, is beyond comprehension or description.  Their existence poisons the living.

                I would love to see the universe do away with such poison, I think the human race would be much better off without that dark influence.  The screams of these souls echo through the barrier between the realms, the living hear their screams of pain and anger often, it influences all of humanity with no regard for location, country or mentality.  It is on each human to ignore those voices and impulses a look to something greater.  If you could fill my realm with a positive force of voices and not just an overwhelming baying of lament then maybe you can make a better world.

                Ammit once told me of the great priests of the Egyptian empire, these men on a daily basis would exert their power over the week and use their position for their own wealth and prosperity, when they would cross over they thought Osiris and Thoth would be kinder to them in their judgment and prosecution because they served the god, Ammit would sit there as their hearts would be fed to her and priests were doomed to wander this earth for eternity.  Ammit stated their hearts heavy with sin were a tasty treat but the ignorance and misguided perception of these people never ceased to amaze her.  She once asked me if I was ever tempted to allow these people to depart from my boat to a more favorable destination.  I answered her.  “I have never been tempted to merit those who do not deserve it although my heart is heavy with a desire to transport more of those that do.”  With this conversation at an end she took her leave and I was left to wonder what she might do in my guise.  I cannot allow the sinful exception because they give lip service to those they pretend to fear.

                I must acknowledge those of you humans who give your all to life, you may stumble, you may fall but ultimately your struggles for good are noticed and loved by the ones you believe in.  Your priests and those in power would like you to fear your gods, to bow in servitude of their supposed messengers, that there is a war between good and evil for your soul.  Know this, there is no war for your soul, the devil has no desire for your allegiance that entity is there to punish the evil not to coddle them.  You love of the Devil incurs his wrath and you will be the recipient of this wrath upon your arrival in his domain.  I hesitate to say his for your gods have no genders, gender is a procreation tool assigned to living biological organisms in order to advance your species.

                Explore and understand your life and the truth of it before you come to me or you will be forever lost,  what you religion teaches you is not always the case, nor is there a singular truth you should grasp onto, if your leaders and religious officials will not lead by example then they are not worthy of your attention, you should not have to go somewhere once a week to pay lip service, if you are a true believer then you temple is within your own heart and you do not need to give your money to enrich someone else, give your charity to those who most need it not those who demand it.

                  I thought today I might give you a glimpse into the world that I inhabit.  Ones who take a ride on my boat see different things than I see.  When it comes to the state of mind the dead see different things.  One who was evil may see eternal fire, one who was greedy is usually eaten over and over again by the spirits of those they wronged.  I hope that these posts reach at least one person who will learn from my words.  I have spent so many years watching the dead.  I do not believe that many people deserve where they end up due to their ignorance in life.  People in this world have no idea what awaits them on the other side.

                A typical man or woman upon death will feel as though they have been separated from their body.  They may have a strong feeling of loss or in some cases freedom, again, depending on the state of mind upon death.  Many times they will be as a third person observing the goings on in the environment around them, at this point what humans refer to as physics have no meaning, the dead become fourth dimensional beings with new knowledge of time, space and matter.

                What I see in my world is vastly different than what the dead see in my world, the truly lost and truly damned are those that see what I see, all others are spared.  Upon the realization of your death you will be brought to the bank of a river.  If you have lived a just and true life, you will see a bright sky, smell the sweet aroma of flowers and honey suckle around you.  The shore will be gentle, the water cool and inviting.  I will come to you in a boat of oak and birch.  My oars are of the deepest ash.  You seat a plush silk cushion with an umbrella to cast a gentle shade upon your brow as I take you along the slow moving river to your destination.  You may see fairies of legend swirling around you their wings glistening in the sun and droplets of water sparkling on their nude flesh as they fly in and out of your line of sight.  In the distance you may glimpse the mermaids of myth that will beckon you to explore the deep with them, their breasts heaving with strength just below the waters crest.  This is a pleasant world, a world I have taken so few to.  This is the place I wish all that ride my boat could see, perception is the reality of the universe and a person’s mind can create wonder of paradise or horrors of hell.

                If you have lived a life of greed, violence, envy or hate… you will see my world.  This is a world of fear and remorse.  A realm where the souls call out in the darkness begging for the release of death ignorant to their demise.  Upon their death they will fall heavy to the shore of a stony river overgrown with thistle and weed, there is no sky here, no sunlight. There is a vast roof of a cave with sharp stalactite’s that hang overhead, sometimes in the distance you can hear them crash to the earth or water.  Here the air is putrid and sickly sweet as if something were rotting just upwind.  The breeze here is harsh and cold.  Here is a place of misery.  I come to you on a boat of bone and skulls hewn together with mud and reed.  My oars are of gnarled driftwood overgrown with algae.  My boat comes against the current of the river creating a sickly wash of foam and insects which wash upon the shore at your feet biting a numbing your toes.

                When you board my ship you will sit upon the rib cages of murders and rapists, you weight will cause the spirits that still inhabit these bones to moan with fatigue and pain, there is no hope in this realm.  I will bring you up the river against a current of black water, frost and frigid air will emanate and the cries of the dammed will beckon you.  Look over the side of the boat and you will see the lost and forlorn reaching for you from the black depths, their souls casting an unearthly glow dispersed through the blackness. 

You have created this realm.  Humanity has taken the darkness of their hearts and poured it into the water of the Styx.  Here there is no salvation, there is no hope.  You have created me as well.  A Boatman to row you through these waters.  I used to have fear upon my birth, but I have been blessed to become accustomed to this realm, though I hope one day to see the paradise some speak of, I have become content with this place. 

I have never become desensitized to those I have to bring here, their cries to god begging for another chance, as if the creator would listen to their pleas in death.  You did not listen to his pleas in life, in your passing the creator has become deaf.  You had your chance to go to him yet you retreated from him, now you must live with me in my realm a realm of despair.

  I wander through my world lost in the thoughts of the day as souls mourn and swirl around me.  I cannot help them, I cannot save them.  They have damned themselves to this fate and I am but a ferryman moving their souls from one end of a bank to another.  

                Today I had an odd encounter with a recently deceased man.  In his life he had been a priest of a high ranking order.  He was not headed to paradise as he would have liked to believe and the boat made of bone and sinew scared he so much my wraith had to come and move him into the seat to be taken to the ninth circle.

                On our voyage he kept asking me why he was not going to paradise and the only answer I could give him was.  One cannot expect to exist in a place of purity if they became who they are because of treachery and deceit.  He was not amused by this and then proceeded to quote bible verses… to me!  I can’t say a soul has ever made me laugh with the irony of their predicament but this man had me echo a great bellow of laughter that resounded throughout the high ceiling of the immense cave we were pushing down.  To be quoted bible verses by a man who was so sure of his right to heaven that he actually tried to threaten me with the word of God.

                I told him that here God did not hear him just as he did not hear God while he was alive.  I have never heard a man spew so many justifications for his behavior.  He truly believed he had done nothing wrong in his life and he had just done what any good Christian would have done to help as many as he could by getting to a position above everyone where he felt he could do the most good.  My response to him was.  “Deceit only begets deceit.”

                When at last it was his time to depart again my wraith had to move him forward, in all the millennia I have been ferrying souls I have never had a man with such ignorance is his heart that even in death he cannot admit the error of his ways.

                When he was finally removed and I was again moving down the river I could hear the blood curdling screams as he was torn apart by other betrayers.  Witnessing this man made me think of what the world above had become.  The machine of propaganda had so spoiled the morals of man and woman that ignorance has begun to cross over even in death.

YOU MUST CHANGE YOUR WAYS BEFORE IT IS TOO LATE!  The creator has consumed the world in water once, the next time will be fire, a fire none can escape.

Today I choose to drift lazily along the Styx.  I have chosen not to move any souls to the opposite bank today.  They are all gathered on the shores waiting and moaning.  This is not the first day I have taken a vacation from my obligations.  Often throughout the millennia have I taken some time for myself to reflect on the eccentricities of the worlds which we as living and dead things find ourselves?  Yes there is a God and he/she has always been, God created man but God did not create the universe.  God was created by the universe, by what or who, none, not even God can say.

All the souls and matter that inhabit this reality are stuck in an endless cycle of death and rebirth, heaven and hell, yet we do not know why.  Why do we exist? The supernatural and the natural.  What created this existence?  Who is the game master?  I think about these things often, but on my vacations I can really allow my mind to ponder the meaning of it all.  Something had to start this.  Something had to bring this whole reality into being.  If there is anything I have learned over the millennia is that everything has a beginning and an end but I find it impossible to peer long enough into the past to see the beginning, before the beginning.  This is something that is hidden from all things that inhabit this universe living or dead, powerful or weak.  We are all in this together, and together this will all end as it began. 

“From one into many, from many back to one.”

My heart is heavy on this day for the senseless murder of innocents.  Although I myself do not subscribe to the religious movement I feel that religion is as paramount in a society as the rule of law.  I feel that these two concepts go hand in hand and you cannot have one without the other.  

I do know on the other hand that religion is used as a weapon by would be kings and lords who want nothing more than to use the power of religion to advance their own personal and greedy undertakings.  I find so amusing that they have no concept of what is waiting for them when they come to me.  Their sins and lust for power and wealth are not free and the debt they accrue will be paid in full when they come to me.

Those who would use religion, the sacred beliefs of another, for their own gain is on the level of Judas who still sits in the deepest circle of Hell reserved for traitors.  I will not say what betrayal he is there for specifically as i do not wish to unduly influence any religion but I will say that the story of his betrayal is not in the popular knowledge of the world.  Stories get warped over the millennia and the truth of them is often lost in the dust of time.  But know there still exists hidden out there the copy of the true story of Judas that will one day be found and revealed.  

Know this my friend, when you betray the standards of religion, any religion and high jack it for your own perverted means, that is the worst offense on can commit for it is not just betrayal against one person it is a betrayal against all who have put their faith in that religion.

Now that being said, religion to me is very different than religion to you.  Religion to the general population is belief in the spiritual, heaven, hell, reincarnation.  But this is not religion, it is only one level of a multi-level belief system.  Included in this is a combination of spiritual, political and territorial beliefs.  Many of these faiths can overlap but they all have the same basic concepts and to commit sin in any of these levels is a mark against the soul.

An example would be if you were to betray your political beliefs for the sake of your own gain the sin committed is just as heinous and a spiritual sin because you have betrayed the one who have put their belief and support in you.  The same can be said for those who unjustly betray their territorial beliefs for their own gain.  Be true to your country and do not burden the people in it with your greed and lust.  The job of a government is not to rule the people but to benefit them betrayal of this responsibility is a betrayal tantamount to Judas.

Those who have murdered because of the territorial or societal beliefs of those around them will be punished for their sins when they come to me.  Remember one thing my friends, brutality to another is a betrayal of humanity.  To force another to bend to your will is a betrayal of the drive basis of the species.

I work because it is something I must do.  We are all created to accomplish a task in this universe and weather living or dead our souls cannot find peace until that task is completed.

We are here to learn, from the richest to the poorest, youngest to oldest this universe is a classroom to satiate our curiosity.  We all live for the adventure that our experiences present us with. No matter our motivations we seek answers to existence and ourselves.

I may rule the realm of the dead but I myself have never seen the glory of Heaven or the torment of Hell.  These concepts are alien to me and I must operate within the environment in which I am presented, just as humans must do the same.  I deal with the dead who are trapped by the horror or misery of their own action and experiences.  But whether it be days, centuries or millennia all will eventually depart from my realm.  

Hail to them who examine their own lives and live as thinkers constantly bettering themselves and working to contribute to the progress of the human species.  Always imagine how the outside observer looking in will see humans.  If you are ashamed to be visible to other species then you are not living to the true potential your species has.  If you hide your deeds in shame, then you are not moving forward.  Move forward and be great, or step backward and be annihilated.

There is no justification. Justification is an excuse for your sins, an attempt to make yourself feel better for the terrible things you do.  If you need to justify your actions or another's then rest assured what you have done or are doing is wrong.  There are whole sections of my realm dedicated to your perverse logic.  You cannot escape reality, it stalks you as I do and eventually it will overcome you. History will remember you as who you are not what you perceive yourself to be.

I dip my fingers in the Styx as I troll along contemplating the existence in which your species has found itself.  Every species lives and moves forward in an effort to make the lives of themselves and of their offspring better but humanity only serves themselves, even your philanthropy is mostly inspired by greed.  There seems to be no true intention to help those you tell the world you try and help.  I say shame to all of you organizations for your false progression of humanity.  You pretend to be in favor of passion and empathy yet bury your head in the sands and close your pockets when the opportunity for true philanthropy presents itself.

My boat is my whole world yet through my interaction with you dead I have gotten a good handle on the psyche of humanity.  I have never had a man or woman in my boat who was proud of their justification and greed, I have never heard one say that their life lived in arrogance and narcissism was a life well lived.  You will regret your actions of earth when you come to me.  I weep for you.