Her voice was raspy and high pitched like she had a sore throat. It seemed as though this entity was not use to speaking and found it difficult to use the vocal cords of its host other than for guttural animal noises. "I saved you mother." she said slowly moving toward me.
I got up and moved slowly back against the wall of the barn trying to put some space between us. "Why?" I asked. I was genuinely confused after the brutal murder of my husband and son by their own family it was hard for me to accept she could be capable of any kind of mercy or honest emotion.
"I don't know." She said inching yet closer to me. "In all my time I have never experienced this before, it is a curiosity I wanted to explore further." She seemed to spit these words out with an almost distasteful expression like what she was feeling disgusted her.
I took this opportunity to attempt to ask questions. I wanted to know what this creature was and what had happened to my daughter. Here before me in the body of my tiny daughter was the subject of nightmares and fear among the religious of the world and for me being not very religious I must say I was having second thoughts about the afterlife. The visions of Hell I had just experienced were still working their way through my soul like some parasite that had invaded my being and began to attack my soul. I wanted to claw the vision out of my head and it was a constant struggle to keep them at bay. It was hard but I wasn't about to waste this opportunity. "What are you?" I said.
"I am your daughter." She said with a mischievous grin inching ever closer. "I am a demon, All demons are born from human mothers. Heaven, Hell and Earth all coexist on one plain. Their is no above or below, there is only here. We are all around you, the battle wages eternally. The Yin and Yang of the universe, the ebb and flow of darkness and light locked in a death struggle in an attempt to consume one another. I am simply the result of a bleed through of these tidal forces. All souls are demon and angels, there are no direct human souls. All the souls that inhabit humans are the reincarnated souls of angels and demons. We are all one, we are all connected."
She sat down for a moment as if exhausted after her explanation, it seemed to take a toll on her to use vocalizations. Every word seemed to be a struggle for her. After a moment she seemed to regain her strength and was quiet as if awaiting another question. I had to ask. What happened to Raine? What happened to my daughter's soul?"
"I understand the confusion, but I am your daughter. My soul is intact, but the demon inside has awakened. It happens all over the world although very rarely. Some of the most notable people in history are because of the demon or angel awakening inside."
"But why? What is this?" I wish my words had been more coherent but I think this was all just to overwhelming.
"We all get a chance at life, who could exist in an eternity of evil or bliss, with that there is no curiosity, no discovery. We created earth as a distraction from eternity. We all take the human form here and there to escape the never ending infinity. But sometimes such a traumatic situation happens that the spirit inside will awaken. For demon this is called falling and for angels it is called ascension. It is simple. I Fell."
"But what happened? How did you fall?" I said trying at this point to merge with the wall. I understood at this point I was in no danger. She had after all saved my life, but there was no shaking the fear she instilled in me. She kept moving closer, she was now inches from me.
"That is another story for another time." She finally reached me. She reached out and put her hand on my face, the touch was so light and loving. It reminded me of how my mother would tough me when I would feel sad as a child. It was reassuring and comforting. I closed my eyes for a moment finding temporary relief in this feeling, even for a moment. I wished I could live in this moment and forget all the proceeded it. She rested her head on my lap and closed her eyes and the mother daughter dynamic was restored.
For the fist time I relaxed, my daughter seemed to drift off to sleep in my lap giving me time to be with my own thoughts for a bit. I had to help her. whatever had made her fall, I had to help. No child should ever have to experience this and old soul or not this clearly was not supposed to have happened. I had to find a way to lock this side back up again. I no longer felt the hatred I had for her. I understood now, she was my daughter, she always had been and she needed her mother.
No comments:
Post a Comment